Tell the Truth, even if your voice shakes.
"The development of codependence has its roots in dysfunctional family systems and occurs over a fairly long period of time. Overly rigid, dogmatic, or authoritarian types of families where there may or may not be alcohol abuse [narcissistic addiction to narcissistic supply as the drug of choice] or dependence appears to produce codependency. These families tend to emphasize discipline and control where rewards are given for compliance with strict and often illogical rules. Children learn that any positive feelings about self are dependant on the mood of someone else. These families may appear to be perfect to neighbors, but there is a great deal of pain and secrecy behind closed doors. Children learn early to not express their thoughts or feelings and to ignore family behavioral problems. This family survival response effectively raises the child’s tolerance for emotionally abusive and inappropriate behavior in others."
http://1solutionfocusedcoaching.com/
The child accommodates, idealises and internalises (introjects) the narcissistic and abusive Primary Object successfully. This means that the child's "internal voice" is also narcissistic and abusive. The child tries to comply with its directives and with its explicit and perceived wishes. The child becomes a masterful provider of Narcissistic Supply, a perfect match to the parent's personality, an ideal source, an accommodating, understanding and caring caterer to all the needs, whims, mood swings and cycles of the narcissist. The child learns to endure devaluation and idealisation with equanimity and adapt to the narcissist's world view. The child, in short, becomes the ultimate extension. This is what we call an "inverted narcissist". We must not neglect the abusive aspect of such a relationship. The narcissistic parent always alternates between idealisation and devaluation of his offspring. The child is likely to internalise the devaluing, abusive, critical, demeaning, berating, diminishing, minimising, upbraiding, chastising voices. The parent (or caregiver) goes on to survive inside the child-turned-adult (as part of a sadistic and ideal Superego and an unrealistic Ego Ideal). These voices are so powerful that they inhibit even the development of reactive narcissism, the child's typical defence mechanism.
http://samvak.tripod.com/faq66.html
"Often they [narcissists] find flaws in others and criticize them fiercely, for this further distinguishes them from those who are defective. Children are ready targets: narcissists consider children flawed and lacking, and therefore most in need of severe "teaching" and correction. This negative picture of children is a sad projection of how the narcissist truly feels about his or her inner self before the self-inflation began. But the narcissist never recognizes this: they consider their harsh, controlling parenting magnanimous and in the child's best interest."
http://www.voicelessness.com/narcissism.html
"...He even punched me in the face once."
https://afternarcissisticabuse.wordpress.com/life/new-ways-to-healing/comment-page-1/
He once...punch[ed] me in the face...and proceeded to gaslight and try and convince me it never happened...but it did...".
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/did-you-ever-do-things-you-dont-remember-doing.15442/
"6. Controlling Behavior.- Controls where you go, what you do, with whom and for how long.
- Controls money and money decisions...
- Protective to the point of controlling.
- Says he's angry when you're "late" because he "cares."
- > Calling to break up first (and only) date with future husband at 7 p.m.
- Takes your car keys, won't let you go to church, work, or school. Won't let you drive."
- http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
Children are naturally selfish and self-focused, but they are expected to grow out of it. They learn that other people exist independently, and have their own feelings and needs that must be taken into account. This early awakening enables a child to “play well with others.” A healthy self-focused child can grow into a healthy adult, capable of being a loving parent, a compassionate community member, and a trustworthy citizen. If an individual can’t make that leap into the world of “others,” they become a narcissist.
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/hesaid-confessions-of-a-recovering-narcissist/
"Any threats of physical force to control you or make you do something should be taken seriously."
> "I can scream loud enough to rattle windows."
> "I'll smash your Smart Phone if I find you looking at porn." - 2011
> "I'll rip Song of Solomon out of your Bible if I find you've been reading it." -1995
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
"It’s not uncommon for men who struggle with porn to be vocally opposed to it in an effort to try and cover up their own addiction..."
STEPHEN KUHN Belt of Truth Ministries
"...beat[s] on tables, punch holes in walls, destroy furniture, throw objects...to threaten you. The message is "You're next! You're just an object I can control and I can break you like our china."
> Throwing barstool across basement during 8th grade science project
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
"I don't know what's wrong with me, but I lately ive been having dreams where I'm yelling at my parents..."
> Occurred regularly in nightmares from 1995 - 2014. The unconscious screaming to escape voicelessness but they just smiled, condescendingly.
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081024212651AApED9s
- "This time I told Mr. C about my recurring nightmares about my mother which spans more than 30 years. His response was that children shouldn't have nightmares about their parents."
- http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/2007/09/do-narcissists-attract-supernatural.html
"Quick temper, unable to handle frustration without getting angry, easily insulted. Will "rant and rave" about minor things like traffic tickets or request to do chores."
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
- "I always knew something wasn’t right with my family, and would often spend hours curled up in the darkest, tightest corner of my room sobbing as I listened to my dad yell and scream at my mom."
- http://www.eloranicole.com/blog/trd5
"Let’s just say you’re ignored, useful, and used. And as long as you tacitly accept this, you’re tolerated, very generously put up with by the Narcissists. Because they’re wonderful like that. If at any point you decide to think for yourself, claim some independence, or do that most inconvenient thing of having personal feelings and emotions… well, you brought their hellfire down upon yourself. You asked for it, and so they gave it to you. Narcissists are incredibly generous."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"... and the endless guilt, shame, and blame they generously gave me."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"He believed all children were evil,"
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
My own [father] would rage about demons needing to be purged ...out of me of course..."
> 1995-Forced to closely examine picture books of Holocaust photographs to supposedly break "my fascination with demons." The ultimate projection by telling his innocent daughter that she and the evil that caused the Holocaust were one-and-the-same. Fucking bullshit! I am actually unable to find anyone else on the entire World Wide Web who tortured their gentle, honest, sweet daughter in this wicked, cruel way.
ttps://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"Narcissists are very adept at putting on a show, appearing perfect, wonderful, sane, reasonable, and good."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"It’s not uncommon for narcissists to be somewhat more agreeable as parents when their children are younger and easier to control. Many children of narcissistic parents report that their parents weren’t as emotionally abusive when the children were young preschoolers - or were pre-adolescents."
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
"...my parents, they have evangelical upbringing (I don’t mind any religion) but some basic life principles they got pretty wrong. Me and my sister, we don’t deserve our independence; we owe our parents everything they gave to us, and they get jealous if we think about getting a relationships. " -Vladimir
http://thenarcissisticlife.com/my-father-the-narcissist-a-narcissistic-father-is-a-tyrant-and-a-bully/
" #5 Twenty-One: In this popular game, you’re not allowed to ever reach the emotional age of 21. Even if you are 50 years old, you will still be treated like a child (a stupid child, a bad child, a silly child, etc.). You don’t get to have face cards and if you do get an ace, it’s only worth one point."
http://thenarcissisticlife.com/games-narcissists-play/
"Growing up in a family of narcissists is akin to being raised in a cult."
http://house-of-mirrors.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-aftershock-of-narcissistic-abuse.html
"To secure their place in the family, these children often become expert in intuiting their parents' feelings and moods and automatically responding in ways they deem helpful. In effect, they become good parents to their own parents [parentification]...What happens when these children enter adulthood? ...Some become gentle, sensitive, and non-assuming adults. They are also generous and caring...Frequently they feel other people's pain as if it were their own, and are racked by guilt if they cannot somehow relieve this distress. Many seem to tiptoe in and out of rooms...for they are unable to stop giving without feeling they are bad or unworthy."- > 1996 parentification began
http://www.voicelessness.com/littlevoices.html
"The critical questions are: "Did my parent respect and value what I said, see myself as independent from them in a positive way, and feel that my thoughts and feelings were as important as theirs." In other words, did my parent allow me "voice?" No adult child of a narcissistic parent can answer these questions in the affirmative...For parents, the implications are clear. Love is not enough. Client after client has taught me this unequivocal lesson: If you want to raise emotionally healthy children, you must give them the gift of "voice." - http://www.voicelessness.com/loveenough.html
"You aren't a person to them. You're just a Project." - J.R. 2009
"So often I have been told: "My mother/father was a saint," by adult children of narcissistic parents, that the phrase always sets off an alarm."
http://www.voicelessness.com/voicewars.html
"A narcissist's offensive thrusts are often hidden under the guise of advice, righteous punishment, or even manipulative praise."
http://www.voicelessness.com/voicewars_page_2.html
"...children of narcissists, generally feel there’s always something missing within them. "
http://www.visualizationworks.com/narcissistic-parent-collateral-damage/
> Hence rampant OCD as an external way to "scratch" this constant "itch"
"This incident with the toddler [flushing Dare to Discipline down the toiler] was not an isolated case. Another child selected my book from an entire shelf of possibilities and threw it in the fireplace. I could easily become paranoid about these hostilities. Dr. Benjamin Spock is loved by millions of children who have grown up under his influence, but I am apparently resented by an entire generation of kids who would like to catch me in a blind alley on some cloudy night.” - Dr. James Dobson
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfeminism/2014/08/strong-willed-child-flushing-dobson-down-the-toilet.html
"To really understand Dobson's cruel nature one must understand his disciplinary teachings. Do an Internet search for Dobson and his old dog Siggie. I fully believe that his treatment of that dog is similar to how he has treated others, from his own employees to members of society. It's no secret that he's a very difficult man to work with. All of his insiders know this. I even once had a professor in the mid-1990s in West Palm Beach (who by that time had twice met with Jim Dobson in Jim's third-story office suite) confess this to me. Years ago my mom, a long-time Focus volunteer who occasionally worked in the third-story executive section of the Administration building, told me that two Focus vice presidents complained to her about Dobson's behavior. She quoted one of the VPs as saying, "Why does Jim talk to me like I'm a child?!" Jim's cold and rigid nature (masked by a friendly radio voice) translates also to his most ardent supporters and close associates. Some of these people talked to me like I had lost my mind after I walked out of my Focus job, as they were blissfully and pridefully unaware that I was demoralized by much of what I saw take place there (they are trained to always tell me that every problem is my fault -- they always favor the organization over an individual). Two days after self-terminating my job I met with the smug director of the Focus counseling department as part of an exit interview. I know full well why this pansy of a man found my depression amusing and why he questioned my Christian faith (Willy Wooten, you're on notice!). These people show a lot of disrespect for someone who walks out on what they have been brainwashed to believe is God's ministry.
http://www.christianissues.com/focus.html
" In fact, the less parents are able to accept the "monster" within themselves, the more readily they are able to see it in their children. "
http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/dissociation.html
"The inherently dysfunctional “codependency dance” requires two opposite but distinctly balanced partners: the pleaser/fixer (codependent) and the taker/controller (narcissist/addict)."
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2013/09/08/the-dance-between-codependents-narcissists/
"Objectification of Others: Others are seen not as separate persons with separate desires and needs, but as means to an end., or ornaments reflecting upon the narcissist."
http://www.michaelsamsel.com/Content/Difficult_Styles/narcissism_interpersonal.html
- "Frequent frustration of children of narcissists is that everyone else thinks their mother or father is the most wonderful person ever, while at home their children suffer in silence with their parent's tantrums, disinterest and put-downs."
- http://www.lightshouse.org/the-narcissistic-parent.html#axzz3SXxv0kTX
- "Some narcissistic parents are controlling and engulf their children...all narcissistic parents fail to treat their children as authentic individuals who have their own unique characteristics and needs. Narcissists treat their children as mere blank screens for projecting their own internal "movies" onto. There are narcissistic parents who deny their children's existence by insisting their children be and do what THEY want."
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
"Narcissists don’t like to be questioned and don’t want to deal with children who can stand up for themselves. It’s common for some narcissistic parents to become more abusive toward their children when the children reach the age of reason (about 7 years old) or when the children enter into puberty, which many of these parents find very psychologically threatening. "
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
" NPD mothers are very envious of their daughters, and very jealous of the daughter’s relationship with her father. "
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/10/24/how-to-play-the-narcissists-game/
" ...your conscience becomes a bludgeon in the hand of the bully."
> False guilt...which may settle in the gallbladder
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/2007/05/few-thoughts-on-bullies.html
"A narcissist parent can teach a child from a very early age that he or she knows you better than you know yourself. They teach the child to surrender what the child knows for what the narcissist parent "knows". It is part of the whole brain-washing process."
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/search?q=better+than+you+know+yourself
"I'm not even entitled to privacy - she invades mt privacy ALL THE TIME, treats my bedroom like an extension of the lounge, walks in whenever she chooses."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"My whole life I have done exactly what my mom wanted, dressed that way, looked that way, spoke that way, never swore, got those grades..."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"I feel like this upbringing has shaped me into my well-mannered and quietly rebellious personality. I feel like I'm too nice; I let things pass me by because I'm scared of the consequences. I just smile and nod and wish and hope that it'll all go away and that someday I'll be able to breath and be my own person. She never lets me say anything in return. Everything I do is wrong. I am not good enough. I can't have a boyfriend. I can't move. I can't wear this or that. I can't ever cut my hair or get it styled. Too much makeup, too little makeup. It's never-ending. I just want freedom."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"She has drilled into me that I have to ask her before I do anything."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"I've adopted my husbands 3 children and my mother wants nothing to do with them."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"If I'm still awake at night, she goes to my room and tells me to go to sleep. "
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
" It is no small thing to survive the parenting, aka terrorizing, of the malignant narcissist. It is an achievement. A triumph of the human spirit."
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/2008/04/on-tear-more-comments-on-evil-mothers.html
"Another method of Infantalisation is to constantly overstate the dangers of the world, so that the daughter thinks the world is an inherently unsafe place and that the only protection is via her mother. This further creates a dependancy. There's such a huge cost though, because the daughter never, ever feels safe, perhaps not even in her own bedroom at night - because bad guys can break into bedrooms at any time."
http://www.daughtersofnarcissisticmothers.com/infantalisation.html
Please click here to go to Page 2 of Apropos Quotes.
"Any threats of physical force to control you or make you do something should be taken seriously."
> "I can scream loud enough to rattle windows."
> "I'll smash your Smart Phone if I find you looking at porn." - 2011
> "I'll rip Song of Solomon out of your Bible if I find you've been reading it." -1995
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
"It’s not uncommon for men who struggle with porn to be vocally opposed to it in an effort to try and cover up their own addiction..."
STEPHEN KUHN Belt of Truth Ministries
"...beat[s] on tables, punch holes in walls, destroy furniture, throw objects...to threaten you. The message is "You're next! You're just an object I can control and I can break you like our china."
> Throwing barstool across basement during 8th grade science project
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
"I don't know what's wrong with me, but I lately ive been having dreams where I'm yelling at my parents..."
> Occurred regularly in nightmares from 1995 - 2014. The unconscious screaming to escape voicelessness but they just smiled, condescendingly.
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081024212651AApED9s
"Quick temper, unable to handle frustration without getting angry, easily insulted. Will "rant and rave" about minor things like traffic tickets or request to do chores."
http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/08/28-signs-of-abuser.html
"Let’s just say you’re ignored, useful, and used. And as long as you tacitly accept this, you’re tolerated, very generously put up with by the Narcissists. Because they’re wonderful like that. If at any point you decide to think for yourself, claim some independence, or do that most inconvenient thing of having personal feelings and emotions… well, you brought their hellfire down upon yourself. You asked for it, and so they gave it to you. Narcissists are incredibly generous."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"... and the endless guilt, shame, and blame they generously gave me."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"He believed all children were evil,"
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"Narcissists are very adept at putting on a show, appearing perfect, wonderful, sane, reasonable, and good."
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/04/09/narcissism-is-the-game-and-youre-it/
"It’s not uncommon for narcissists to be somewhat more agreeable as parents when their children are younger and easier to control. Many children of narcissistic parents report that their parents weren’t as emotionally abusive when the children were young preschoolers - or were pre-adolescents."
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
"...my parents, they have evangelical upbringing (I don’t mind any religion) but some basic life principles they got pretty wrong. Me and my sister, we don’t deserve our independence; we owe our parents everything they gave to us, and they get jealous if we think about getting a relationships. " -Vladimir
http://thenarcissisticlife.com/my-father-the-narcissist-a-narcissistic-father-is-a-tyrant-and-a-bully/
" #5 Twenty-One: In this popular game, you’re not allowed to ever reach the emotional age of 21. Even if you are 50 years old, you will still be treated like a child (a stupid child, a bad child, a silly child, etc.). You don’t get to have face cards and if you do get an ace, it’s only worth one point."
http://thenarcissisticlife.com/games-narcissists-play/
"Growing up in a family of narcissists is akin to being raised in a cult."
http://house-of-mirrors.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-aftershock-of-narcissistic-abuse.html
"To secure their place in the family, these children often become expert in intuiting their parents' feelings and moods and automatically responding in ways they deem helpful. In effect, they become good parents to their own parents [parentification]...What happens when these children enter adulthood? ...Some become gentle, sensitive, and non-assuming adults. They are also generous and caring...Frequently they feel other people's pain as if it were their own, and are racked by guilt if they cannot somehow relieve this distress. Many seem to tiptoe in and out of rooms...for they are unable to stop giving without feeling they are bad or unworthy."
http://www.voicelessness.com/littlevoices.html
"The critical questions are: "Did my parent respect and value what I said, see myself as independent from them in a positive way, and feel that my thoughts and feelings were as important as theirs." In other words, did my parent allow me "voice?" No adult child of a narcissistic parent can answer these questions in the affirmative...For parents, the implications are clear. Love is not enough. Client after client has taught me this unequivocal lesson: If you want to raise emotionally healthy children, you must give them the gift of "voice."
"You aren't a person to them. You're just a Project." - J.R. 2009
"So often I have been told: "My mother/father was a saint," by adult children of narcissistic parents, that the phrase always sets off an alarm."
http://www.voicelessness.com/voicewars.html
"A narcissist's offensive thrusts are often hidden under the guise of advice, righteous punishment, or even manipulative praise."
http://www.voicelessness.com/voicewars_page_2.html
"...children of narcissists, generally feel there’s always something missing within them. "
http://www.visualizationworks.com/narcissistic-parent-collateral-damage/
> Hence rampant OCD as an external way to "scratch" this constant "itch"
"This incident with the toddler [flushing Dare to Discipline down the toiler] was not an isolated case. Another child selected my book from an entire shelf of possibilities and threw it in the fireplace. I could easily become paranoid about these hostilities. Dr. Benjamin Spock is loved by millions of children who have grown up under his influence, but I am apparently resented by an entire generation of kids who would like to catch me in a blind alley on some cloudy night.” - Dr. James Dobson
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfeminism/2014/08/strong-willed-child-flushing-dobson-down-the-toilet.html
"To really understand Dobson's cruel nature one must understand his disciplinary teachings. Do an Internet search for Dobson and his old dog Siggie. I fully believe that his treatment of that dog is similar to how he has treated others, from his own employees to members of society. It's no secret that he's a very difficult man to work with. All of his insiders know this. I even once had a professor in the mid-1990s in West Palm Beach (who by that time had twice met with Jim Dobson in Jim's third-story office suite) confess this to me. Years ago my mom, a long-time Focus volunteer who occasionally worked in the third-story executive section of the Administration building, told me that two Focus vice presidents complained to her about Dobson's behavior. She quoted one of the VPs as saying, "Why does Jim talk to me like I'm a child?!" Jim's cold and rigid nature (masked by a friendly radio voice) translates also to his most ardent supporters and close associates. Some of these people talked to me like I had lost my mind after I walked out of my Focus job, as they were blissfully and pridefully unaware that I was demoralized by much of what I saw take place there (they are trained to always tell me that every problem is my fault -- they always favor the organization over an individual). Two days after self-terminating my job I met with the smug director of the Focus counseling department as part of an exit interview. I know full well why this pansy of a man found my depression amusing and why he questioned my Christian faith (Willy Wooten, you're on notice!). These people show a lot of disrespect for someone who walks out on what they have been brainwashed to believe is God's ministry.
http://www.christianissues.com/focus.html
" In fact, the less parents are able to accept the "monster" within themselves, the more readily they are able to see it in their children. "
http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/dissociation.html
"The inherently dysfunctional “codependency dance” requires two opposite but distinctly balanced partners: the pleaser/fixer (codependent) and the taker/controller (narcissist/addict)."
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2013/09/08/the-dance-between-codependents-narcissists/
"Objectification of Others: Others are seen not as separate persons with separate desires and needs, but as means to an end., or ornaments reflecting upon the narcissist."
http://www.michaelsamsel.com/Content/Difficult_Styles/narcissism_interpersonal.html
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
"Narcissists don’t like to be questioned and don’t want to deal with children who can stand up for themselves. It’s common for some narcissistic parents to become more abusive toward their children when the children reach the age of reason (about 7 years old) or when the children enter into puberty, which many of these parents find very psychologically threatening. "
http://amh82.tumblr.com/page/2?route=%2Fpage%2F%3Apage
" NPD mothers are very envious of their daughters, and very jealous of the daughter’s relationship with her father. "
https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com/2013/10/24/how-to-play-the-narcissists-game/
" ...your conscience becomes a bludgeon in the hand of the bully."
> False guilt...which may settle in the gallbladder
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/2007/05/few-thoughts-on-bullies.html
"A narcissist parent can teach a child from a very early age that he or she knows you better than you know yourself. They teach the child to surrender what the child knows for what the narcissist parent "knows". It is part of the whole brain-washing process."
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/search?q=better+than+you+know+yourself
"I'm not even entitled to privacy - she invades mt privacy ALL THE TIME, treats my bedroom like an extension of the lounge, walks in whenever she chooses."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"My whole life I have done exactly what my mom wanted, dressed that way, looked that way, spoke that way, never swore, got those grades..."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"I feel like this upbringing has shaped me into my well-mannered and quietly rebellious personality. I feel like I'm too nice; I let things pass me by because I'm scared of the consequences. I just smile and nod and wish and hope that it'll all go away and that someday I'll be able to breath and be my own person. She never lets me say anything in return. Everything I do is wrong. I am not good enough. I can't have a boyfriend. I can't move. I can't wear this or that. I can't ever cut my hair or get it styled. Too much makeup, too little makeup. It's never-ending. I just want freedom."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"She has drilled into me that I have to ask her before I do anything."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"I've adopted my husbands 3 children and my mother wants nothing to do with them."
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
"If I'm still awake at night, she goes to my room and tells me to go to sleep. "
http://latestdud.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Deal-With-A-Controlling-Mother#comment-4000217
" It is no small thing to survive the parenting, aka terrorizing, of the malignant narcissist. It is an achievement. A triumph of the human spirit."
http://narcissists-suck.blogspot.com/2008/04/on-tear-more-comments-on-evil-mothers.html